Last year at this time my dog, Bo, was very sick. The vet and I both did not know if he was going to make it. He hadn’t eaten or drank for days, and his organs seemed to be failing. Bo has been my shadow from the first day I met him, before he was even my dog. He loves being at the barn, and he loves me. He has gone everywhere with me, staying in the truck whenever I went somewhere dogs weren’t allowed, and pining away at the edge of the driveway during the summer when it was too hot to stay in the truck.
I am not a person who cries a lot, or shows a lot of emotion. During my PCS recovery that was different. In many ways I felt like I was a different person during that time and I came out of the experience changed in many ways. One of the great things that I got from that time was a peace, and a freedom that is hard to explain.
As I was cleaning out some drawers I came across a notebook where I had written some thoughts about my experience with Bo’s illness that I think begin to touch on what that experience was:
“When Bo got sick I cried, and it felt good to cry. My soul felt refreshed/renewed in love and pain. It was on a small scale what I felt when I had my concussion. Overwhelming pain and uncertainty, but also a sense of finding myself and what truly matters to me, which in reality is not much and at the same time a lot.
Things I love: My son, my husband, family, horses, nature, music, freedom, health.
Things that don’t matter so much: looking good, schedules, people’s lists and opinions, my opinions, my endless striving.”
As I look at 2016, and how I want to spend it, I think this list makes it pretty clear.
What values do you want to honor in 2016?